December 2009
WAHH!!
I love my theme!!! CUTE!
Random facts about me.
I dont know the name of my fav color. Its between teal and turquois.
My ears are pierced but i never wear earings.
I love to paint my nails when i i want to feel productive.
I clean my house everyday.
My cat died about a month ago and i still think he’s alive when im half awake in the morning. He would always be the first to wake me up with his wet nose on my face.
I dont hate...
Reblogging...
because what i feel is impossible to explain. I dont even want to try. I love him. We are together. But its not right. and thats it. and it goes deeper than that. but too much to say. I love him though…
I cannot let you go
tanyaisuppose:
because I am still in love with the person you used to be.
distance-of-love:
You told me I’d always be special. Forever. You just meant never. And now i’m left to pick up the pieces of my own shattered heart.
“Love is not blind, It sees more and not less,
but because it sees more it is...”
– Will Moss - (via starblinded)
“Love is shown in your deeds, not your words.”
– Fr. Jerome Cummings (via spudcheyne)
Merry Christmas!
<3
“It’s the worst feeling in the world to love & hate someone all at the same...”
– (via missmaes)
Ive noticed...
That when i dont blog about my life and day to day problems, nothing bad seems to happen lol. Whenever i would blog about soemthing, wether it be good or bad, something bad would happen. Not just blogging but just speaking my mind period, out for everyone to read. Everytime i do blog about something big in my life it seems to make it bad or make it worse… Its wierd. like some supersticious...
You should see my scars. Try to comprehend but you’ll never comprehend.
awesome bday weekend for my bawbee!!<3 just went racing in some damn go karts and hurt my wrist really bad… it hurts to even type right now. bahhh…. =/
MJ....
Soo… Most of you know that i dont smoke pot or do any kind of drugs. I think its one of the most disgusting habits and very unattractive. I think that people who smoke pot are weak and dont know how to have fun, relax, and dont know how to say no. I think they are weak because all these reasons as to why they smoke can be accomplished with out it. No, ive never tried it before, although ive...
I feel...
Good. =] Can you tell?? lol I have this “everything will be ok” feeling. Like not all my worst fears will come true. I think its part of me trying to let the past go. My past with brandon and my rape… Im trying so hard to let it go. And i think it might be working… Not going to forget because that would be foolish but just trying not to dwell on it either. I feel good right...
You stole everything that was important to me. You raped me. And i never even saw your face… I feel dirty. And i try and try to erase it but i cant. It happend. And there is nothing that i can do about it. Its been 4 years, i still have nightmares, things i cant watch or things ill see and it will bring me back to that place you left me. And it will play in my head… over and over...
Damn...
Im a good ass girlfriend… I just realized i didnt buy anyone anything except for him. oops lol. I was supposed to buy my mom and step dad some stuff. But whatevers. Im sure ill go shopping again very soon. Last night he said ” we should resurrect our myspace” lol it made me smile and it touched my heart. Yess its only myspace, i know… But when he broke up with me a while...
Went shopping....
Feel much better. Bought him some more things for his bday. Spent time with my bestie.<3 Cant wait for thursday. =]
its not right for a woman to read. soon she starts...
(via vermicide)
Ughh...
So after i write these blogs and im all full of hope and feeling good about him I get a text.
“Rawr forever”
Isnt that nice… And i was actually starting to feel special… ha. silly girl.
Everything is gonna be ok...
Trying to stay positive....
I really am… But i cant help but to feel as if i have to shield myself from you. I feel as though i need to be prepared for another repeat… I love you. I dont understand you. I hate you at times because of the past. Please make it through this month…
Everything will be ok. I will be ok. Its not the end of the world. Everything happens for a reason.
Winter Break
Just finished my final for my philosophy class about and hour ago. YAY!!!! Im now done with school… For now lol. Got brandons bday on thursday and his bday weekend… eeek. Im superr excited. Then xmas with my family should be awesomeee lol. Then off to big bear for a few days… then new years partyy. Then my besties bday is coming up along with my dads. Very busyy month ahead of...
Bahahaha....
Reread my last blog… SOO many typo’s lol… Whatev.
This weekend...
Was great. Got to San Diego on friday. stood up watching movies and acting retarded like old times. =] Woke up saturday morning and felt happy to be in his arms once again. We layed there and talked a bit. Then fell back to sleep again… Woke up at around 1 and got up and took showers. Then his mom brought us some chinese food. Yumm… watched X-Men: The Last Stand. Fell asleep in his...
Bipolar?
I seem like it. Maybe i am. hmm…